Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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