3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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