Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
I could make wine with my vomit
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
I did not marry a roomba.
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