Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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