This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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