hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
I need to calm my uterus...
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