week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
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