There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
Randomize
