we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
Randomize
