i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
