There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Randomize