Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
