I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
goodnight i made you a song goodbye
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Randomize
