it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME