You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
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