how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
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