dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
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