I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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