After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Houston, we have a squirter
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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