all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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