your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
operation harelip BJ is a go
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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