Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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