I bet he comes in French.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
