Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize