i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize