Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize
