Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
