Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Randomize
