Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
