I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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