it was like eating out sand paper
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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