I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
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