i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
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