so explain again why im purple
no
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
my shit smells like andre
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
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