does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
