I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Randomize
