If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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