I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
