Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize