Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
