dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
Randomize
