Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
