ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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