I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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