Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Randomize
