just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Randomize
