Christians are straight up FREAKS
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
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