So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Randomize
