it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
