I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
zippers are such a cool invention
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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