i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
You were trust falling into bushes
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
i out mim tonsoeep
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